DailyMail And Openlove101: Having Sex With Other People

“Something is lacking in their own relationship if they have to seek out other couples for satisfaction.”

What do you think about this one?

Let’s see what our cameraman had to say too!

Join the Openlove101 online club and get exclusive contentprivate Q&As, giveaways, and more. No spam, JUST LOVE.

4 Comments

  • Lynn says:

    Hi John & Jackie,

    Another great video, which I think continues the theme that you have consistently tried to convey to people. Your sexual relationships with other people is not taking away from your relationship with each other, but is adding to it. I think this is the hardest part for people to grasp. Perhaps over time, more people will begin to step outside their comfort zone, and realize that love, pleasure, joy, etc… are not finite, and that there is plenty to go around, regardless of how many people you share it with, in whatever way you share it.

    Maybe another approach would be to question someone like that with: If you have a really good friend, does that mean you don’t have the capacity to have another really good friend, or ten really good friends? It is no difference in my mind, that saying one emotion or method of connection has some limit. Why should love, joy, pleasure, or the means to those feelings, be limited? I believe society as a whole has been taught, generation after generation, that there is only one path to a happy relationship, and clearly the divorce rate in this country should tell people that isn’t working as described. HA!

    Anyway, I really enjoy watching you guys “debunk” these ridiculous statements, that I might have subscribed to myself a few years back, without someone like the two of you sharing more open and honest information on another option.

    Thanks, as always, and I look forward to the next video.

    Lynn

  • Raymond says:

    Something’s Missing? Whatever!! First , let me say that we’ve been been visiting colette in Dallas for a few years and enjoy it sooooo much! Secondly, we have yet to find a couple to go all the way with in order to fulfill our fantasy of full swap! As for others not being in the lifestyle saying that “something must be wrong or missing in swingers relationships” is just crazy!! As to what John is saying in the video I too love to see my wife taken to new heights of satisfaction. Again, we haven’t done anything other than to pleasure one another at club colette in front of strangers . We’ve had two encounters where the male and female have touched and caressed my gorgeous wife’s body and that had us both really crazy. With this being said, that’s what it’s all about…..seeing each other reaching levels of excitement with others that we thought we’d never find. Once it’s done we drive home quietly other than the noise of my mind racing about what she’s going to tell me upon our arrival at home. We get home and tell / ask each other about our feelings and excitement of the night. To hear her tell the story and to relive the night is satisfying for the both of us. There is nothing she nor I can say to each other that will ever wreck what we’ve built over the yrs of our relationship and honesty is what’s kept us together and will keep us together forever. The only thing missing in our relationship is time…..time where we aren’t able to be surrounded be others in the lifestyle.
    You two keep living the dream!

  • Michelle says:

    I have to agree and disagree at the same time on this subject. My husband and I have been swinging for a couple of years now, and it all started by communicating to each other what each of our desires and fantasies were and it eventually turned into wanting to fulfill those fantasies for each other and with each other. So as far as our relationship lacking or missing something, that wasn’t the case when we became swingers. That being said, I think as human beings we are naturally attracted to other people, not to just one person. We thrive on the feeling we get when we first meet an attractive person, the butterflies in our stomachs, getting aroused by the thought of their touch. It’s those feelings we lose with our significant other over time, due to the comfortability and knowing everything about our partner. The element of surprise is gone, when you know all there is to know about them. Thus, in a way, there is something lacking or missing in the relationship, as we go and find another couple or single that we are attracted to and try to connect with. Just to get that stimulation and arousal flowing again. I realize every relationship is different, and we can’t catergorize every couple. If it works for you and your partner, then stick with it.

  • I’ve heard this “response” many times from staunch opposers to our lifestyle. My first and quick retort to them is…

    It isn’t at all about lacking. It is everything about ADDING more satisfaction to an already mutually enjoyed and satisfying relationship and encounters!

    Big difference between filling a ‘void’ versus enhancing and invigorating an already exhisting GOOD, HEALTHY, passionate romance, relationship, and broadening it — which in turn makes us both more whole, maturing more in self and as the couple, and ever growing WITH each other! (big smile)

    John sums it up perfectly: yours and John’s relationship is expanded, enhanced, challenged, refreshed, and only causing the two of you to become even MORE close, MORE understanding, MORE loving in the sense of not only typical common “love”, but through compersion as well, per your camera-man! There is literally nothing negative gained by our lifestyle… when it is wisely and honorably exercised! Negatives lost? Absolutely! The common insecurities and distrust in self and/or others soon evaporates! What a wonderful result, right!? And oh yeah! Sex, rather “refined/ing sex” is one of the (many) very nice perks too! Hahaha.

    And if I may Jackie, I’d like to offer an alternative REVERSE question (to the implications of the man’s comment) as to what the essence of his question MIGHT reveal about his (and others like him) thinking or mindset about swinging and/or monogamy…

    Monogamy implies, perhaps CAN imply, that we as a (lifetime?) spouse are born (in our DNA) absolutely capable and gifted to be all things all the time for our spouse/partner, 24/7, 365 days a year, for our lives! That is to say your spouse and yourself, under the innuendos of traditional monogamy, will ALWAYS FOREVER MORE be pure perfection every single day and night in all possible ways! There will not be a day/night that goes by where you CAN’T be everything perfectly for your spouse! Hehehehe.

    Honestly, how realistic are those imposed expectations and implications? For me personally, they are borderline absurd. (laughing) I would much rather allow my partner/spouse to ALWAYS have freedom and opportunities to be EVERYTHING she has ever dreamt of becoming! That includes sexually, of course, but as John stated “It isn’t all about sex.” Period. Our lifestyle offers so much freedom of expression, self-expression, acceptance, non-judging friendships — under pretty explicit guidelines & protocols — maturing growth, and most of all very meaningful significant human connections! Mic drop. (wink)

    Hah! As I watched the last half of the video, I see we’re saying the same things! LOL

    Excellent video you two, as always! You two are fantastic! (big smile & hug!)

Leave a Reply