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Swinging Lifestyle And Playing Alone

By December 18, 2018 January 6th, 2019 Swing Lifestyle Videos

We received a bunch of questions lately about how it works when playing alone in situations like different rooms at house parties or clubs or even going on separate (play) dates – and how we dealt with the emotions of the first time we played alone/separately. Watch our new video and join the discussion!

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  • Jackie/John,

    Another excellent vlog. What I liked and agreed with most between your two separate “alone” encounters or playtime with other swingers was 1) how much the two of you communicated with each other; probably before, during(?), and after. Very smart when one or both of you are playing for the first or second time with that person. Trust is earned over time. And 2) how you both WANTED to share the experience with each other, which can happen a number of various, fun ways! For example, sharing details immediately after when you are both home. Another example, and a method I and past (long-term?) partners used: calling the other (who wasn’t playing with anyone, usually me – LOL!) on the phone so that I/they could listen in… like a voyeur. (wink) The critical concept to remember is to always form progressing, proactive habits of raw, honest communication with each other. Like you mentioned Jackie… make them HABITS, 2nd nature!

    With my last two (long-term?) lifestyles partners we’d often do this sharing/playing alone long-distance. I’m talking about 300+ miles long-distance with one — she lived in south Houston while I was in Dallas. And the other was a private charter flight attendant; you won’t BELIEVE how mega-horny MALE pilots, copilots, and flight engineers truly are! Hahahahaha! Nevertheless, while she was gone on 3, 4, maybe 5-night chartered trips out of the country, I encouraged her to ENJOY herself when finished with work. Sometimes (actually often, because she was super hawt!) that opportunity would present itself even after she explained our situation/open-relationship and how I was fine with it. Jackie, John… you both already know how well that “trust” can be earned and how smoothly it works… daily, yes? (big grin)

    As you both iterated quite well, trying something new, something edgy only one time… simply does not offer you the best or the most exhaustive method of determining whether you enjoy it or not — much less if you are uptight, worried, attention-divided and elsewhere, etc, etc. Honestly, it takes several (multiple?) attempts to draw up an equitable decision. Oh yeah, and THEN you must consider the fact that sexual chemistry with a person/persons varies (sometimes greatly!) person to person to person to person… depending on your vitality and endurance! LOL! No, kidding about hyper-frequency.

    Or am I? (sneaky grin & wink)

    Great stuff you guys! Keep on rockin’ it!

  • Kevin says:

    Great edition. Very insightful, honest and motivating. This is something we’d talked about as a couple multiple times more recently. Taking an iterative approach is a great idea. Above all, trust in our relationship and respect for eachother’s desires is essential. Thanks for sharing what works for you!

  • John says:

    This was easier for us than it was for you, I wasn’t worried about my wife when she started doing mid-week play dates, because she was with guys that we both knew well for a few years. She’d just say that Jim is going to come over on Thursday. I’d get home from work perhaps while they were still upstairs having sex, perhaps afterward when they were downstairs for a snack. The three of us would stand around and talk like ordinary friends.

    It’s because we’re part of a house party group that’s been together for decades. There’s close to 200 people on our invite list, of them maybe 40 – 60 we’ve known for over ten years. At the parties, we’re strictly free agents. We work the room separately, hook up or not, and after a while we find each other and compare notes. Depending how much energy we have left, sometimes we play together then….

    — J.S.

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