That was my response to this beautiful email we received from Mary Elizabeth, another one of our wonderful members of our community.
Her note touches on so many different topics and is the perfect synopsis to what can happen when we as a society calm down, take a breath, and practice a little bit of empathy.
I am absolutely in love with this well thought out and beautifully executed email and received permission from her to share it with you below.
Hello John and Jackie,
I know that this email I am replying to was generated automatically and some sort of algorithm will handle this reply but, since you asked I thought, oh well why not? On the off-chance, this does find its way to your inbox and you happen to read it, I will be happy to tell you what the most difficult issue is I face in the lifestyle. Obviously, it would have to be the fact that I am a transsexual woman.
I really must commend all of the folks I have encountered at your colette clubs both in Dallas and just recently, New Orleans. This would be employees at your clubs and the members themselves. Everyone has been very courteous and quite receptive. Sometimes I wonder if perhaps I make more out of it than others but I hope that you feel that is understandable. Maybe, you have had those very same feelings? I think our society as a whole can be very fickle when it comes to tolerating and even accepting things that are outside the norm. But then the “norm” is usually “one size fits most” and most do NOT look good wearing it, no matter how utilitarian it may be. It begs the question, just exactly how common is a “normal” person anyway? LOL
At the risk of getting overly philosophical, I personally feel that diversity has a VERY necessary role in our society and it’s part of the very foundation of our country. We recognize that we are all equal no matter our differences and we all have the right to be exactly as our Creator made us. Which I think, is always a cause worth championing.
Whomever we are and whatever we do certainly will not always appeal to everyone, and that’s okay. But there’s no harm in seeking out and gathering with others, who we share similar likes and dislikes. Some could say, it’s potentially subversive but in my opinion, that occurs when ones’ inalienable rights have been infringed upon. Do that and invite subversion every time, guaranteed!
Despite my own reasons for being a member, I truly admire what you guys have done and are doing. It is not just about being open sexually. It is really about getting others to take just a moment and think about who they are and what makes them an individual and hopefully, in turn, reflect upon the concerns of another. My belief is that the greatest gift we have is that of each other. No human can survive in isolation of other humans and the lack of even the slightest hope of human contact if you could even imagine such a thing. I think we are just as dependent on each other as we are on the sustenance to maintain biological life. Which after all is what separates humans from all other life on the planet. Yikes! Where am I going with this?
I have felt very isolated for a very long time and after taking the chance and going to one of the clubs, I don’t feel so alone anymore. While I may not be everyone’s cup of tea, I am not an unattractive person (modesty aside and confidence speaking) and the reception I have had probably changed my life and, that’s no small thing! We could talk gender and sexuality all day long but I think the most important issue is just being and feeling human, flaws and all! Pretty cool, huh?
I guess it goes without saying, I am in your corner and happy to be a part of the lifestyle and whatever loftier purpose it may serve. However, truth be told, I really just want to relax and enjoy myself and have some really great, leg trembling, toe-curling, sex and hope my new friends experience the same!
John and Jackie Melfi are in a consensually non monogamous marriage. They have been featured in ABC News Nightline Special Report “Getting Naughty In N’awlins”, Inside a New Orleans Swingers Convention, and CNN “This Is Life” with Lisa Ling. The Melfis are the force behind the industry famous colette swingers clubs in New Orleans, Dallas, Houston, and Austin. With over 20 years of combined experience, this powerhouse couple coaches thousands of singles and couples through their award winning blog Openlove101.com.